Cinderella

FORGET THE GLASS SLIPPER!

FORGET THE FIREWORKS! 

FORGET THE BELLS AND WHISTLES! 

Because, you know what? That's not love. That's not what defines love. 

I would like to share with you an experience, with the permission of the respective persons, I had last year that really taught me what love is:

It was Halloween and my good friend and roommate  and I had just finished getting ready for our Church's Halloween Party. She asked her fiance to take pictures of us. I can't remember the exact details, but whatever it was, resulted in them getting in a rather heated argument. The last thing I remember before going back into our apartment was her throwing her ring back at him. I was completely shocked as I sat on the couch thinking, "how could this happen? They're supposed to be the perfect couple. What's going to happen now?" I was so focused I barely noticed her run up to her room. Before I could think of what I could do to comfort her, he burst through the door, threw his backpack on the floor, and ran up to her and he did not come down until he was walking down the stairs, hand-in-hand with her, with that ring back on her finger. That right there...that's love. 

It's not about the glass slippers. It's not about the fireworks. It's not about the bells and whistles. 

It's about the work that it takes to get there. Love isn't easy

Now I don't want you to think that I don't believe in those things - the glass slippers, the fireworks, the whistles - because I do. I really, really do. Of course I get twitter-pated. Of course I get chills. Of course  I feel those sparks. But that's not what makes love happen. It's the opportunity to make it happen that creates it. 

There's an amazing song that beautifully explains what love should mean: 

Honestly...what more could you want? Because I know that I couldn't ask for anything greater.

"I want a love that takes my breath away
A love that’s full of surprises

I want a love that makes me realize what’s important in life

A love that’s real; that’s raw

I want a love where if my children were to walk in and see their parent’s dancing in the kitchen they roll their eyes but in their heads they know how lucky they are

A love that my children strive for

I want a love that makes me feel

A love that has made me learn to feel

I want a love where I know who I am

A love where I know who he is

I want a love that has taken time to built

A love that has and always will require work

I want a love that’s not afraid to talk

A love that talks despite the fear

I want a love that’s not afraid

A love that tries all

I want a love that has hardships and trials along the way

A love that builds our faith together

I want a love that’s full of love

A love that lasts into the eternities"

Written July 7, 2013

By Elisse Cook

You might think me to be a hopeless romantic - completely unrealistic. But I know I'm not. Despite what the world may tell me, I know I can have this kind of love. And I know that we all have the opportunity to as well. 

I want you to know that despite how scary love may seem, it can be the most amazing thing when it's worked for - when giving up isn't an option. 

So...my question...why are we so scared of love? Why do we think we don't deserve love when, in reality, we do? Why do we seem to reject one of the greatest powers and feelings out there? 

Avec Amour, 

Elisse 

Why Is That?

Girl exhibits masculine qualities...what do we call her?

Tomboy.

Boy exhibits feminine qualities...what do we call him?

Gay.

Why is that? Why is it that we associate the two together? Just because a guy has more feminine qualities he's an identified gay?

I would like to do a little exercise with you. I want you to close your eyes and think of a man in your life who is creative. He's able to create the most beautiful artwork. He sees life in a way that's so different from everyone else - it's beautiful. He's more expressive with his feelings and He's not afraid to show it. Now, open your eyes with that person in mind. And this could be any man in your life. But there is one who knows everyone who exhibits each of these qualities and more.

And that man is our Heavenly Father. Were we not made in his image? Do we not share qualities and characteristics with Him?

With that in mind, is it really okay to identify someone as something they're not? When did we decide that we had that right?

 How often do we tell someone who they are?

How often does that person listen to us?

How often to we listen to that person who tries to define us?

As opposed to my weekly question, how about a challenge? For a day, I would like to challenge you to  not identify who someone is. Instead, ask them who they are. Allow them that opportunity.

Avec Amour,

Elisse

It's Kind of a Funny Thing

"This is why we teach there is an eternal family."- Brother Michael D. Williams, Marriage and Family Therapist

When family is concerned, we have the privilege to move away from the natural and into the divine. However, there are decisions and choices that have to made in order to reach the divine.

"What am I going to do to ensure that my family reaches the divine?" Not just my future family, but my current family as well.

I think we sometimes forget the effect we have on our family - it doesn't matter if you're five or seventeen, you can alter your family dynamics.

Meet Tavi Nicole Cook. My cousin. My hero. The only person I've met who's literally perfect - when I thought there was no way I could ever know what it was like to be perfect. Not very many people have the opportunity to say that they know someone who is perfect. And I got to say that. Not only knew someone, but was related to someone who reminded me so much of what I believe Jesus Christ to be. 

In her short life of six and a half years, she accomplished things that were beyond here physical capabilities. She proved herself to be more than others made her out to be. And she truly changed the dynamics of not only our family, but of everyone that even heard about her. She had, and still has, that ability. 

Even though it's been a year and a half since she passed away, she still has that effect on people's lives. It's amazing, really. Because of her, I have changed the way I want to raise my family. Even though she  was unable to walk, breathe on her own, eat, speak, or move, really, moved our family from the natural to the divine. 

And that's what I want to say I achieved in my life - that I had that kind of effect on my family; both current and future. 

And I would like to ask you to ponder the same question - what are you going to do to help your family move to the divine?

Avec Amour, 

Elisse


"3 Joseph Smith, the ^aProphet and ^bSeer of the Lord, has done more, ^csave Jesus only, for the salvation of men in this world, than any other man that ever lived in it. In the short space of twenty years, he has brought forth the Book of Mormon, which he translated by the gift and power of God, and has been the means of publishing it on two continents; has sent the ^dfulness of the everlasting gospel, which it contained, to the four quarters of the earth; has brought forth the revelations and commandments which compose this book of Doctrine and Covenants, and many other wise documents and instructions for the benefit of the children of men; gathered many thousands of the Latter-day Saints, founded a great city, and left a fame and name that cannot be slain. He lived great, and he died great in the eyes of God and his people; and like most of the Lord’s anointed in ancient times, has sealed his mission and his works with his own ^eblood; and so has his brother Hyrum. In life they were not divided, and in death they were not ^fseparated!" - Doctrine and Covenants 135:3

Exchange Theory

This week in class, we studied four different family theories. The one that I found myself most interested in is the Exchange Theory - worth/outcome = rewards - cost. In short, relationships are a give and give back short of thing. This theory seemed to generate quite a bit of discussion in the sense of how much are we expecting in return. 

My teacher, Brother Williams told a sweet story about him and his wife - he makes breakfast for his wife every morning and each day she says, "Thank you so much." And you can tell she says it so sincerely. And he said he doesn't expect anything in return because he can tell how appreciative she is of this service. One part that really got to me was, "I've never once felt the need to not make her breakfast. I just do it."

When he told us this story, I'm not going to lie, I got chills. I couldn't help but feel the love that they have for each other - true, sincere, and genuine love. 

And that's how the Exchange Theory should be - we give because we love that person and we accept because that person's love is all we need. 

And so I ask you this:

Why do we find it so difficult sometimes to accept another's effort and love? Especially when we have no problem offering it?

"I think being able to fall in love is a wonderful and strategic gift from our Heavenly Father. We are so much more likely to make the needed changes in our life to become celestial if we have someone in our lives we can't bear to be without through the eternities. Having them is almost like a gentle prod, and reminds us that eternity is dependent upon our choices here. They make the journey worth the struggle. I look forward to making that journey with my eternal companion one day so that we will truly have the chance to be together forever." - Sharene Larsen

Avec Amour, 

Elisse